Insecurity after bereavement

[Coldfinger]

We had a collie cross from a rescue shelter and a couple of years later took in a collie/lurcher cross who was being abused. Both ladies got on fine and were kept indoors and slept in a large cage (door open) in an area which used to be the old kitchen before the extension was added. When the older dog could no longer stand we had to have her put to sleep and that is when the problems has started. The younger dog (now 10) has started to want to be in the rest of the house. She jumps over the child safety gate to gain accrees to the rest of the house. When we stood the ironing board in in the way to stop her jumping over the gate she has ripped the cover to shreds. She has attacked the bottom of the back door so we have abandoned plans to replace it with a uPVC door. I added a removeable board above the gate to stop her jumping over but she has chewed the gate's plastic handle and destroyed it. During the night she rattles the gate continually and we have had to start locking her in the cage to stop her rattling the gate but she is doing her best to get out of the cage but when we are out of the house she is yelping and whining so loud that our neighbours can hear it. It won't be long before someone reports us for cruelty!

We added a teddy bear into the cage, she sucks it but it hasn't eased the situation. When she is with us she keeps her paw or head on our feet but her need for constant attention is causing problems when we are not with her. Ideas needed desperately.....

[Husky06]

We had a collie cross from a rescue shelter and a couple of years later took in a collie/lurcher cross who was being abused. Both ladies got on fine and were kept indoors and slept in a large cage (door open) in an area which used to be the old kitchen before the extension was added. When the older dog could no longer stand we had to have her put to sleep and that is when the problems has started. The younger dog (now 10) has started to want to be in the rest of the house. She jumps over the child safety gate to gain accrees to the rest of the house. When we stood the ironing board in in the way to stop her jumping over the gate she has ripped the cover to shreds. She has attacked the bottom of the back door so we have abandoned plans to replace it with a uPVC door. I added a removeable board above the gate to stop her jumping over but she has chewed the gate's plastic handle and destroyed it. During the night she rattles the gate continually and we have had to start locking her in the cage to stop her rattling the gate but she is doing her best to get out of the cage but when we are out of the house she is yelping and whining so loud that our neighbours can hear it. It won't be long before someone reports us for cruelty!

We added a teddy bear into the cage, she sucks it but it hasn't eased the situation. When she is with us she keeps her paw or head on our feet but her need for constant attention is causing problems when we are not with her. Ideas needed desperately.....

I don't have time right now to post a good or long response, but the more you give her affection the more you nurture it. So the more you do that, the more she will be like that. Dogs don't always "need" that attention, it's something we typically create in a sense feeling sorry for a dog who was abused. A dog who would have willingly moved on if we helped them to. Do you ever walk her or do anything to drain her energy before you leave?

[devastated70]

I am sure not an expert and i guess i went about things the wrong way when i lost one of mine and tended to the one i had left.
My opinion... (and only my opinion),, i feel that animals can grieve just like we can, hurt like we can, miss their buddies just like we can. So when I lost mine, I could not help but to want to give Ollie more attention because I knew he was missing his sister probably more than me (at least at the time of passing).. and maybe because "I" needed the nurturing (from him) too. he was very insecure after her passing, (doesn't seem to be the extreme that you are experiencing), but that day, He became an inside dog (when I was home),,, he used to be outside with his sister every day, once she passed, when i'm home, he is in with me. I don't think I treat him any different from when Sadie was still with us, because I was affectionate with both of them all of the time. But after losing her, i could not stand the thought of him out there by himself. Maybe i am wrong? Even though I don't "treat" him different, he is inside now, and I did change up our routine,, walking him, spending time training, playing games. At first when it happened for quite a few weeks when i went to work he stayed under the deck the majority of the day.. but now 6mths later he is much more active and secure with himself. Mine were still young (under 2 at the time of passing), with yours being 10 yrs and spent alot of time together I'm sure she is missing her friend (my opinion)... I am not sure what the right answer is for you and your situation, not sure if you are thinking of getting another dog (not as a repacement), but it might help with the one you have left?

[Husky06]

I am sure not an expert and i guess i went about things the wrong way when i lost one of mine and tended to the one i had left.
My opinion... (and only my opinion),, i feel that animals can grieve just like we can, hurt like we can, miss their buddies just like we can. So when I lost mine, I could not help but to want to give Ollie more attention because I knew he was missing his sister probably more than me (at least at the time of passing).. and maybe because "I" needed the nurturing (from him) too. he was very insecure after her passing, (doesn't seem to be the extreme that you are experiencing), but that day, He became an inside dog (when I was home),,, he used to be outside with his sister every day, once she passed, when i'm home, he is in with me. I don't think I treat him any different from when Sadie was still with us, because I was affectionate with both of them all of the time. But after losing her, i could not stand the thought of him out there by himself. Maybe i am wrong? Even though I don't "treat" him different, he is inside now, and I did change up our routine,, walking him, spending time training, playing games. At first when it happened for quite a few weeks when i went to work he stayed under the deck the majority of the day.. but now 6mths later he is much more active and secure with himself. Mine were still young (under 2 at the time of passing), with yours being 10 yrs and spent alot of time together I'm sure she is missing her friend (my opinion)... I am not sure what the right answer is for you and your situation, not sure if you are thinking of getting another dog (not as a repacement), but it might help with the one you have left?

Sounds like you did a good job, walking, training, playing etc, good to boost the confidence and help the dog move on. Your right, dogs mourn for a time too, some longer than others. Though they typically move a lot of times before we do though.

[devastated70]

thanks husky, from your first post i thought i might have went about it the wrong way, tending to him, etc..
at first he did follow me everywhere but i just let him, i didn't "coddle" him or really "treat" him any different than before, just kind of let him do his own thing until he got used to "OUR new routine".. and he sure isn't the "cuddling" type and now he seems to be fine on his own and by himself, much more secure with himself, and has taken on more responsibilty of protecting me, the yard, the house

and HONESTLY, it has helped ME get through it too,, gives ME something to focus on and keep me going.. if it were not for him, i'm sure I would still want to just lay in the bed all day,,, but walking him FIRST thing in the morning helps me get out of bed, spend time with him and gives us both something to look forward to. (and he absolutely LOVES it)...

[Husky06]

thanks husky, from your first post i thought i might have went about it the wrong way, tending to him, etc..
at first he did follow me everywhere but i just let him, i didn't "coddle" him or really "treat" him any different than before, just kind of let him do his own thing until he got used to "OUR new routine".. and he sure isn't the "cuddling" type and now he seems to be fine on his own and by himself, much more secure with himself, and has taken on more responsibilty of protecting me, the yard, the house

and HONESTLY, it has helped ME get through it too,, gives ME something to focus on and keep me going.. if it were not for him, i'm sure I would still want to just lay in the bed all day,,, but walking him FIRST thing in the morning helps me get out of bed, spend time with him and gives us both something to look forward to. (and he absolutely LOVES it)...

Yeah, if you had spent time just sitting there, cuddling with him, nurtering it then that woul have made it worse. Just by allowing him to follow like you did, but not with the affection is fine. It's good to have the walk every morning, definitely for both them and us. I wouldn't do much of anything if it weren't for walking my dogs in the morning, and helping other people work with their dogs. A lot of dogs I see that came from shelters that were abused, scared, nervous, "quiet or shy" dogs are ones that tend to end up being dogs with problems like biting, nervous, or aggression problems later on because of how they were brought in and handled from the beginning.

[CKelly976]

We had a collie cross from a rescue shelter and a couple of years later took in a collie/lurcher cross who was being abused. Both ladies got on fine and were kept indoors and slept in a large cage (door open) in an area which used to be the old kitchen before the extension was added. When the older dog could no longer stand we had to have her put to sleep and that is when the problems has started. The younger dog (now 10) has started to want to be in the rest of the house. She jumps over the child safety gate to gain accrees to the rest of the house. When we stood the ironing board in in the way to stop her jumping over the gate she has ripped the cover to shreds. She has attacked the bottom of the back door so we have abandoned plans to replace it with a uPVC door. I added a removeable board above the gate to stop her jumping over but she has chewed the gate's plastic handle and destroyed it. During the night she rattles the gate continually and we have had to start locking her in the cage to stop her rattling the gate but she is doing her best to get out of the cage but when we are out of the house she is yelping and whining so loud that our neighbours can hear it. It won't be long before someone reports us for cruelty!

We added a teddy bear into the cage, she sucks it but it hasn't eased the situation. When she is with us she keeps her paw or head on our feet but her need for constant attention is causing problems when we are not with her. Ideas needed desperately.....

I am a bit confused, are you keeping the dog sectioned off to only one part of the house at all times, or just when you're sleeping?

your dog is lonely (thank me capitan obvious later) I don't argue or add to the above suggestions with the walking and change up of the routines to help build your dogs esteem back up.

I just seemed to miss whether or not the dog was only sectioned off when you're sleeping or all the time.

[Coldfinger]

Thanks for the comments so far.

The dog is sectioned off when we are both out of the house (which isn't often as my wife is usually at home) or when we are sleeping. She is likely to set off the burglar alarm if allowed to wander around at night or when we are out. I'm fairly sure that if we had an intruder during the night she would lick them to death. On two occasions where she has jumped the safety gate she has left a deposit or two so that is another reason I don't want her to have free range but she is normally house trained and has plenty of access to the garden during the day.

[meri]

i hope this is long resolved. She's used to being in there with her buddy, not alone. She just doesn't like to be in there alone. Maybe you'll have to mount an actual door in that door way? Then she'll scratch the door, but it'll close out the noise and keep her in there.
Can she have a new buddy? Or kitten?