Dobber:my secret cat

[jewliebug]

Hi, i recently *acquired* a cat from my aunt, who got it from someone else, a kitten that my mom doesnt know about... Thats not gonna mean it wont get anything it needs though, i just need to know what it needs.
It also keeps making a noise like its got something caught in its throat, im guessing a hairball, what am i supposed to do about that, none of my other cats did that around me.
My kitten is a manx or at least partly, it's got a bobbed tail, and the people who had him before my aunt said he was part manx.
I looked manx cats up on the internet and it said, "one fourth wet food three fourths dry." Or at least it said thats what i should feed it. Im wondering what else i need to do for it, i think im planning on nuetering it (by then my mom should know about it) and get its rabies shots but do cats need their kitten shots?
I call my cat Dobber because thats what my friend's grandma said she was calling him while she watched him.


I know their are some drawbacks to not telling my mom about a cat, but i dont really know what they are. Anyone can tell me if they have any ideas, i still might not tell her, but i will consider telling her if the reason is good enough, (you know, dangerous to my kittens health ot something, but i havent seen anything my mom could do to help that, she doesnt even like cats.)
I also need to know of a good way to teach my kitten things, i dont know of any ways to punishing a cat, like when he flexes his claws on my face or rubs himself against my face, i could just push him away and say "no" but he comes right back and does it again.
Anything you can tell me would be good, even im not going to like what you say, (like someone saying its a real bad idea to do something that im already doing.)

[NiteRose]

Well, julie I am pretty sure you are going to dislike what I say, but here goes anyway.

If you’re a minor depending on your mother, you need to tell her about the cat. For 1, yes kittens need shots, and also a wellness exam from a vet, you’re going to need money for this. Also if your kitten does happen to have a health problem/emergency again, you’re going to need money.

Are you keeping the kitten in your room only? I can not imagine that being good for him. If you have a big enough room, you may be able to keep her litter box and food separated enough so that it won’t bother him, but cats, even though are small animals do need their exercise. And if your kitty meows and such won’t your mother hear it?

The kitten rubbing up against your face is a show of affection. He is not intentionally doing something wrong to you. But if you do not like it, pushing him away and saying no, is a good way to start training him. When he comes back at you, just walk away. Also getting a spray bottle of water and squirting her will help as well. When I first got my cats, I had to train them to be gentle with their claws on us, when their claws were out when playing with me, I would take their paw and hold it, and say No Claws to them, I would do this every time, and it worked for me.

Another reason I think you need to talk to your mother about the cat, is because if she finds out down the road and is angry with you about hiding the cat, she may want you to get rid of him right away, and I would hate to see that happen to him. I hope that if you talk to her about it now, and she refuses to let you keep it, that she will give you time to find a proper home for him.

I am sorry your mother does not like cats, and maybe you can work on her, and teach her to like them. But the unfortunate thing is, you are under her roof, and if she says the kitty goes, the kitty is going to have to go, it is best to find her a good home.

Good luck.

[horsefeather]

i agree with niterose. you NEED to tell your mom about your kitten. for several reasons--really having nothing to do with the cat itself--but with your relationship with you mom.

if you dont and mom finds out, she may wonder what else your hiding and then the TRUST between the two of you will be broken. and she may never trust you again. theres more at stake here than keeping the kitten. maybe sit down with her and try to come up with a compromise. maybe something along the lines of can we try this for a couple of weeks and if it doesnt work, we'll find a good home. the only problem is that you may get attached--if not already and it will be harder.

also, although you think you are being responsible and mature about your kitten--worried about his health, shots, care things like that. i guarantee you mom wont see it that way. what she will see is her daughter immaturely and irresponsibly hiding something from her. when you hide something from a parent, that isnt responsible. she may even treat you like a little kid. the mature thing to do is to talk to her about the cat.

and also, there may be another reason your mother doesnt want cats in the house. she may be allergic, or afraid of them, she may have had a bad experience with a cat and hasnt gotten over the fear. just saying she doesnt like them is an easier way than by saying im afraid of them. some parents dont want kids to know they have this fear because thy dont want to disappoint the children into thinking they are not the idols their children made them into (its a whole psychologic deal).


just remember this--you mom WILL WILL WILL WILL WILL find out about the kitten--she may even know already. you cant no matter what you do, hide a living thing in your house with out someone noticing. you dont think sh'll notice you buying kitty litter or cat food. she wont hear meowing or bouncing around she wont smell the urine or cat food--as small as they are, cats still make noise when they move across a floor--i can hear talia walking across the kitchen floor from down in the basement.


the longer you wait to tell her the harsher your punishment may be--not to mention the broken trust all for a kitten you may not be allowed to keep anyway.


yes they do need thier kitten shots--3 rounds of them! thats 3 trips to the vet, plus the trip to get it neutered before the yearly vaccinations. how are you getting it to the vet with out moms help. even if she doesnt have experience with cats, if something happens, then she can help. she can get him to the vet faster (its better than waiting secretly for someone to come and get you) and can offer the comfort that you need when your worrying about dobber, and if need be, she may even be able to help with vet bills in an emergency.
as you can see there are many reasons why you should tell her. and only one why you shouldnt. its better knowing if you can keep the cat than wondering if you have to give it up.

jewlie, you need to tell you mom about the cat. you may be suprised by the outcome. the best advice i can give is not to do an "im keeping this cat no matter what" attitude. if you try to compromise, you mother may see it as a maturity thing and may be opened minded. you may be suprised by the outcome.

and remember like niterose said, mom has the final word and if she says kittie goes, kitty goes. asl long as you are under 18 years old and living in her house, she makes the rules. only by breaking them do you prove that you are not mature enough to be treated or trusted like an adult.

[Mogeysmom]

Kittens are a HUGE responsibility and require lots of care and MONEY!
Tell your mom now and get the issue settled. You want what's best for the
kitty (high quality food, veterinary care, lots of love, litterbox management,
care when you're not around etc...) and if you're not able to provide that,
it's best to find someone else who can. Pets are not toys. It's sort of like
having a baby actually. It's a commitment to a living creature with feelings
and needs. Think about it.
Do the right thing JewlieBug.
Let us know how things turn out.

[jenn]

When I was in High School I brought home a kitten someone at work gave me. I told my mom I found it abandoned outside the place I worked because I knew if I asked her if I could have it she would say no. I picked the runt so my mom would think how helpless and small it was. well long story short, Mom found out it was a lie. One of the worst things I could have done in my parents house is lie. You need to tell your mom. what I went through with my mom was not easy and really hurt the trust in our relationship. Your mom will find out. I am not sure how they do it but they always do. Tell her and though she will be mad at first you may be able to work it out so everyone is happy. good luck

[jewliebug]

well, what i was thinking was to let Dobber out when he is about 3 months old and if she asks about him say, "of, he's been here for a few months now, why do you think iwas asking for a cat a while back." or something.

The thing is, my mom wants to be able to control everything, and shes not a very good control freak beacuse shell give at something that doesnt m,atter much, and then shell say no to something that does. My older brother Shane and i are paying for thie internet and a second line, and she still threatens to turn it off because we dont keep the house clean enough, but we clean it really well, and then my other two brothers mess it up before she comes home to see it. Theres four of us kids living in the house and she still expects it to stay perfect for the next four hours when she comes home.

I offered to pay for the kitty that i asked for, and still she said no because of some dumb reason that has nothing to do with why i want a cat. Shes not allergic to them, its just a control thing.




I go to this rescue ranch for dogs every week, and every one in the car i ride in knows i have a cat, so i buy my cat stuff then. I'm sure she'll find out about Dobber whether i want her to or not, but how can she say i cant have one when im paying for it and she hasnt even noticed for the past three weeks that ive had it (im hoping it will be at least that long before she finds out.)
As for all the shots the kitten needs , my mom is one of those who won't pay for them, whether she wants a cat or not. We've had cats before, she even liked one of them, but all she payed for was the rabies shots.
Also, if my mom finds out about him, ive got two people who want him, my cousin, who i got him form in the first place, she wasnt exactly all for me getting him, and my teacher, who caught me walking past the school one morning, so i was forced to show her the cat.
Im glad you all told me why i should tell my mom, thats all the stuff i need to know. Anything else i should know please tell.

[jewliebug]

oh yeah, its not staying in only my room, i was a little leery...?iis that how you spelll it?.... at first at letting him outside, because i dont want him running away, but i let him out anyways. He's already litterbox trained, I'll call the vet and ask what needs to be done with him i think. He comes out this wednesday (the vet)
He's also not a very loud cat, i looked manxes up on the net and it said they werent loud cats, and hes not , but he does make a lot of noise playing with my shoe and markers ( he likes those better than his ball) but my mom isnt home a lot, and that helps too. I plan on her knowing about him sooner or later, but shes just soo stingy, what has she to complain about?
I dont think my mom will wonder what else im hiding in my room because im not really the kind of person to be doing something bad (i dont consider hiding a kitten bad, ill figure out what its called later) I did ask for one after all, she cant say i didnt.

[horsefeather]

hiding a kitten in your room is irresponsible. thats what its called. from what it sounds like, you mom will be REALLY mad if she finds out youve been hiding a cat from her. like i said if she doesnt want one, she has her reasons. i still say tell her and explain that you will pay for everything and she doesnt have to worry about anything at all. im glad you already have a couple of homes lined up just in case.

i strongly suggest you tell her and ask to come up with a compromise.--like can we try for 2 weeks and if the kitten doesnt work out, ill give him to someone else.

if you spend all this money on him and you cant keep him, then thats alot of wasted money.

[jenn]

Listen to these wise people Julie. I can tell you love your kitty but it also sounds like your relationship with your mom is a little troubled. I am 27 but I can clearly remember what it was like to live with my parents and all that thinking they are unfair and controlling. But being a mom myself now and thinking back I can totally see where my parents were coming from on alot of things and I wish that I could take back some the stuff that I did and the arguments that we had. Try to talk to your mom, it is really worth it, beleive it or not she loves you and wants you to be happy. Catch her in a good mood, be honest, tell her about your feelings. If you remain calm and sincere and avoid arguing and becoming defensive she is likely to do the same.

[jewliebug]

its not troubled, actually its better than most persons relationships with their moms, but we do have our moments. Plus i guess its not that shes a control freak, she just doesnt have enough good days. But she had one yesterday... On an impulse i called mom over at her bf's, no one answered, but mom called back and i asked what i wanted. so i said *i have a cat*
She wasnt as mad as i thought shed be, all she did was threaten to sick the dogs on it and to drop it in the middle of the woods. But her voice wasnt as angry as i thought itd be, so i just *no mom, dont do that.* as if i was telling her not to hang a picture on a certain part of the wall.
it turned out a lot better than i thought, i told her i had had the kitten for a week and she asked why she hadnt heard it meow. (because she wasnt home to hear it) or because its not a meower and manxes arent very loud cats.
Shes leting me have him on trial, and if he stinks up my room or digs in her garden then hes out, but so far he hasnt done that. I think moms bf talked her into keeping the cat, and i caught her on a good day. If i had told her on the day i got it i would not have been able to keep it. Plus, if its been here for a week and she hasnt noticed then what reason is there not to keep it. It would have been fun to see how long i could keep him secret.


Are all of you adults? I dont consider hiding a cat irrisponsible,i can almost see how you do, i think one of the only reasons i told (there maybe others that i hadnt really thought about) is because my mom would have been hurt if i had successfully hid a cat for a month or so without her noticing. You guys are really good at yelling at me lol, its different when someone i dont know is giving me a lecture, especially over the internet, i cant tune you all out. Its kinda funny though, my moms best friend knew about the kitty and she didnt do nothing to discourage me from keeping it secret. Other adults didnt say anything either, not even my teacher. Maybe they figured id learn on my own or something... who knows?

Thanks for your help, Sam

P.S. What do kitten shots do? i seriously doubt my mom got them for any of our cats, i dont even think she knew about them.

[jewliebug]

she wasnt really mad at me, more at the fact that there has been a cat at our house for a whole week. She warned me not to try this with a dog because she didnt want any other dogs until we moved. Im not that stupid, i know what would happen if i brought a dog home.


My cat really likes my face, he lays on my chest and rests his head against my face, once he lay down on my head and fell asleep. Once his paw went across my face, and this time his claws werent even out. Ive never heard of a cat acting that strangly, does anyone elses cat like faces?
I think he did that to my cousin when she had the cat.

[jewliebug]

oh yeah, Jewliebug is my dog, her real names Jewlie, she has a lot of nicknames, Jubug, Juju be, jewliebug, Ju Je fruit, Juni, and more i cant remember...
Bye, sam

[jewliebug]

Oh yeah, Dobber is making a weird noise with his throat, kind of a sneezing, coughing noise, maybe it sounds like a hairball or something, i told this one lady about it and she was suprized that a nine week old kitten would get a hairball... and is it normal for cats to snore?
But she said i should let Dobber lick margerin or something oily. i havent tried it yet, because im not really sure its a hairball.

[dlaura]

The shots your kitten needs will keep it from catching various viruses and diseases from other animals. You are aware of a rabies shot, but there are others. Such as the feline lukemia shot. Other cats can be carriers of feline lukemia but not be affected themselves and all it takes is a lick by an infected cat for your kitten to catch this. I would not be letting your kitten outside until it has had at least the rabies shot and feline lukemia. Is there a chance that mom knew about the kitten but was allowing you the chance to be honest with her in order to continue a trusting relationship with you? The other's advice was right on the money and I would warn you not to try this again as you might not be so lucky the next time to be allowed to keep it.

[NiteRose]

jewlie, I don't think any of us were yelling at you. We were just concerned about the situation. I am glad that things worked out with your mother, and I am glad you decided to tell her sooner rather then later. I hope she does not honestly mean what she says when she threatened to stick the dogs on it, or abandon it.

The shots that kittens get are important immunization shots. Just like as a child we all get them. A vet should examine your kitten (like I said on top of shots, they should be examined for overall wellness), and you should tell him about the noise he is making. It does not sound normal.

There are better hairball remedies then margarine, you can get them from your pet store and are usually treats for your cat.

It sounds like you are making a attempt to give your kitten proper care, I would suggest asking your vet to suggest some good books or websites then can help you learn more about caring for a cat. Or maybe posters here can suggest them. The posters here can be very helpful when someone has a question, but I think since you plan to keep the cat, reading and getting some first hand knowledge will help you.

Princess likes to use my face as a bed/pillow when we sleep at night, and often when me and Fatboy are cuddling he will rub my face with his paws or his face.

Good luck with caring for you kitten, and please let us know how things go with you and your mother, as well as his health.

[horsefeather]

jewlie, im glad everything worked out and you are able to keep the kitten on a trial basis. if you can, please post some pic of him and also of jewlie. what kind of dog is she.

[wigg1ty]

Hi J-bug is it possible that the strange noises coming from your kitty may be because he is half minx? I dont really know but I think that they make a diferent sound then your tyipical meow. Like I said..Im not sure does it seem like hes struggling or in some kind of discomfort? Im glad everything worked out for you thats great I wish my parent were as understanding with my animal obsession when I lived at home. You pay for your second line? Thats Great! Take it easy on your mom when she seems controling. ok try lol. When I look back on it all i wish I had developed a better work ethic, and learned to apreciate the awards that come along with it. Its been hard for me to adjust to adult life( I wish I were 10 again) My parents were pretty slack with me in some regards.If I refused to clean my room there was no punishment, I was never made to get a job, Heck even if I got cought sneaking out there was only a slight tap on the wrist. I even started smoking when I was 16 there was objection to it but since there were no consequences I refused to stop... I thought it was a game and I could quit at anytime(I thought I knew everything) Now Im still struggling with my addiction. Parent can seem like a big pain in the...big toe and with some things I swore that I would never put those limits on my kids when I grew up(there were some limits in my house it wasnt totaly crazy lol) Now I often say if my 16 yr old self could hear me speak she would run for the hills and call me a sell-out traitor. Ha ha things deffinatly change! We are never the same person from year to year we always grow and learn. By the way I had no Idea you were a teenager! I wish I was that cool and mature when I was your age! Good luck with your Kitty.

[jewliebug]

How old did you think i was?

Jewlie is a jack russel terrier, her brother is the same kind as her, they both have the same markings, but their body shape is completely different, Demon's head is a little over sized, he weighs about 20 lbs. Their both really cute, Demon is in a strange way, Jewlie is kind of petite, and a little Devil, way more so than her brother. She hates men lol. (well,not really hate, just a healthy dislike until she gets to know them.)

Now, a didnt plan on trying this soon, because i know mom doesnt like cats that much, but my friends dad, (and my moms bf) has this trailer park, and Kelsea, my friend, and her cousin, Victoria figured out that there is little kittens living at the trailer park...
Victoria caught the mama cat, and i recently figured out she doesnt like me that much, so i doubt i could convince her to let it go so she could feed her banies, although, they might be weaned already, im not good at telling how old things are. They look, in my opinion about 6 weeks.

Kelsea has already caught two little kittens, we know there's a third, but there might be a fourth too.
We cant just leave them to be wild and multiply can we?
My mom said at first that there was no way that i could keep one, but then, later she said she doesnt really mind cats as long as they saty outside.
Dobber sleeps in my room, i let him out in the day, (it's sort of something i have to do, otherwise my room is gonna smell reALLY bad, his litter box is in my room, and i feed him in there, although i might change that.
But im gonna need to keep a kitten inside so i can tame it before i let it out.

My mom knows of the kittens, and so does her dad, neither of them want them inside. But does our own room count as inside? Mom lets Dobber be in my room, Why should she care if another stays in for just a little while?

Kelsea's kitten are so cute though...
Aiden, who Kelsea named is a girl, and Owen is a boy. I suggested Aiden before i knew what sex the kittens were because it means fiery, and kelsea thought it sounded like a girls name, i dont think so, well, not really because i like that name. and Owen means young warrior. Owen bit me right through my sweater, i dont know why i was surprised that he could bite through.

Owen is a tabby, it looks like he could be the runt, but hes anything but helpless, hes just smaller than his sister. He a tabby with a round face and round eyes, hes got little splashes of white all over him, and all four paws are white. Anyone ever see the Emerers new move? He kind of has the shape of that cat, so does his sister.

His sis is a white tabby,( sort of, she kind of a caramel color from the legs up) they both have sandy colored eyed i think.


About putting the pictures on here, i have to ask my brother if our scanner works.

[horsefeather]

My mom knows of the kittens, and so does her dad, neither of them want them inside. But does our own room count as inside? Mom lets Dobber be in my room, Why should she care if another stays in for just a little while?


-------------------------


yes your room counts as inside. i also think she would care if you have more than one cat in the room. you managed to get away with one, but by bringing another kitten into your room, your mom might feel like your taking advantage of the situation and refuse to let you have anything else..ever.

she didnt sound thrilled about dobber but was willing to cooperate with him, i think bringing another cat into the house is pushing it. not only might she make you get rid of the new kitten, but she might make you get rid of dobber as well. it sounds like your mom is being generous, and you are being greedy.